Penn State Erie, obviously conscious of the fact that the approaching baby boomlet in America will give it potential to swell their ranks, decided to take a stride towards fielding the best Dungeons and Dragons team in all the land by announcing the results of a study that looked into the length and perception of sex.

The survey, conducted among 38 experts, who were supposedly not colored by society’s media-driven expectations, reported that the ideal length of time to, er, last, was 7 to 13 minutes– anything less was too little, and anything more, too much. This strikes me as odd, but then again, I suppose I’m one of the societal horde that’s always unrealistically fantasizing about sex that carries on for hours…I mean, a guy can dream, right? And you’ll forgive me for saying so, a group of 38 clinical nurses, researchers, therapists, and other assorted experts… but you’re kind of telling me that there’s such a thing as too much ice cream here. I think John Lennon said it… “You may say that I’m a dreamer…but I’m not the only one…”

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